Amazon to change venue name to Climate Fudge Arena
Given their push to have fossil-fuel powered energy for their Oregon data center and therefore taking a major step back from their climate goals, Amazon announced plans to change the name of their Seattle green arena from Climate Pledge Arena to Climate Fudge Arena at an upcoming event. The announcement was met with excitement from Seattle locals, whose appetite for the confection surpasses even its desire for emissions reductions and corporate accountability. Said Climate Fudge Arena spokesperson, “Now that we’re really fudging our pledge quite a bit, we really wanted to get at the essence of climate destruction by fossil fuels and fudge was invented in the 19th century, shortly after American oil production began.”
Major climate science reversal! Latest IPCC report: all okay, stay complacent
Taking in critique of their latest climate change analysis and the push by grassroots climate deniers, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPPC) announced an incredible reversal of decades of climate science, saying that despite their recent report stating the globe is at a critical crossroads, it turns out everyone can stay complacent as there is no global warming after all. “We’re so sorry for all the hubbub these past decades,” said an IPCC spokesperson. “We encourage everyone to relax and enjoy the end of the world with a Mai Tai.”
(Now the real) climate news roundup: Vanuatu takes on the world, clean trucks score in the US, and the fight in NY heats up (literally)
And now…here’s a quick summary of notable real climate and clean energy news that you may have missed…
Tiny, Pacific island nation Vanuatu, whose 300,000 people faced down two cyclones this month, made big headlines by asking the question: “Can countries be sued under international law for failing to slow down climate change?” This week, the UN passed a resolution asking the International Court of Justice (ICJ) to issue an opinion on whether governments have “legal obligations” to protect people from climate hazards and, more crucially, whether failure to meet those obligations could bring “legal consequences.” While ICJ could take up to two years to issue its decision, the implications for the resolution could shape thousands of lawsuits against governments and impact pending litigation globally.
California again flexed its muscles on cleaning up transportation pollution this week when the Biden administration granted California the legal authority to require that half of all garbage trucks, tractor-trailers, cement mixers and other heavy vehicles sold in the state must be all-electric by 2035. Combined with the Advanced Clean Cars rule, California is now well poised to lead on cleaning up its air quality and roads. The Advanced Clean Truck rule has already been adopted by six other states—New York, New Jersey, Washington, Oregon, Massachusetts and Vermont—all of which were waiting for permission from the Biden administration to enact it.
On the other coast, New York’s turned up the (electric) heat on its efforts to clean up new buildings with the first legislative ban on gas and fossil fuel appliances in most new buildings, including single-family homes. New York would be the first to take this step through legislative action; California and Washington have done so through building codes. Locally, voters in Eugene, OR will decide the future of new construction with a ballot measure drawing the ire (and campaign spending) of the gas industry. Notably heat pump purchases in the US actually exceeded those of gas furnaces in 2022, with global heat pump sales growing by 11%.
Bonus read in Modern Love: Everything was going great until I told him to dump his kerosene lamp for an LED…